51: Service

Life feels worthwhile when it’s been used for the betterment of others

Yes, that may come across as preachy, yes it’s probably an unpopular POV in what has become an extremely selfish world

But it doesn’t make it any less true

Being there for others, especially those you love and care about, those you are grateful to have in your life….it’s the best feeling in the world

Why spend your life consumed by selfish wants and needs when you can just as easily pass the time in service to your fellow man, in service to humanity

I’m not talking about complete disregard for your wants and needs because the irony of being helpful to others is you gain a greater sense of what actually fulfils you and what you want out of life

And even more ironic than that is you begin to realise that you already have that ‘feeling’ that you think those things outside of yourself would bring

It’s already within

Service is a great antidote to that feeling of emptiness. It’s a great shield against self centred worries and concerns that more often than not paralyse you into inaction

No service requires, demands even, that we act. Action is at the centre of a call to serve, engaging with the world and actually living life is what a life of service is all about

Serve others and without consideration for your own needs, you’ll soon discover that yours have been met too

Be well

SRZ

42: Where Your Treasure Is….

That’s where your heart is

Wanna know what someone really cares about despite what they tell you? Ask them two things

Where do you spend most of your time?

On what do you spend most of your money?

Ask most people to do something with you or for you and their excuse for not being able to usually falls somewhere between, “I can’t afford it” or “I don’t have time right now”

But the truth is we all have time for something….what is that something for you?

What or who would you make time for no matter what, regardless of what else could be going on in your life?

Whatever or whoever came to mind, that’s where your heart resides

We show we care by spending time and money, yet given the choice, most of us would choose the time over the money

Spending money is relative to the person spending it. If I’m a child with wealthy parents then I may not care all that much for their gifts and lavish lifestyles opportunities they bestow upon me. No, in that scenario i would much rather their time, them being wealthy only means that they most likely have limited time to spare

So I’d rather receive their time because in doing so they would demonstrate to me that I am a priority

Now, a pot of money from my working class parents would mean the world to me because I’d know fully well what they’ve sacrificed to get me those resources

So really and truly, our treasure resides where we are most willing to sacrifice

What have you being sacrificing recently?

Has it been worth it?

I hope so

Be well

SRZ

38: No Pedestals

Nobody is perfect so if you want to be, better think about how to become a nobody….

Okay, that’s a pretty lame joke but it’s tinged with a lot of truth

I have a tendency in relationships to place someone I’m interested in on a pedestal which frankly they probably didn’t ask for and if they did, that would be a major red flag

Don’t place anyone on a pedestal

They are just human. They do things they wish they hadn’t, they get embarrassed, they lie, they have hoped and dreams just like you and me

Placing them on a pedestal or bestowing on them characteristics that they do not have or have yet to demonstrate is a dangerous game and will only go to hurt you in the long run

I’ve recently started crushing (again) on a friend who was respectful and clear that she didn’t feel the same way, the first time I felt how I felt

My mind has been thinking about whether now could be a better time than last time, I wondered if she’s involved with anybody and that thought alone triggers an emotional reaction

That’s a red flag – on my part

I need to deal with that before it hinders my progress and social development in life

Truth is I will probably always feel something for her but the pedestal has to go

To place her on that level while ignoring my own worth is not only unhealthy but it’s equally unattractive

Why do I write all this?

Because it’s what I’m currently feeling, to write anything else would be tantamount to ignoring myself – another red flag

If you’re gonna have s pedestal that you place anybody on, try a higher power or a purpose or mission that inspires you to become that best you can be

Otherwise, no pedestals for anybody, including yourself. Don’t be a narcissist- you guessed it….it would just be another red flag

Be well

SRZ

34: Dead Time

Imagine being locked away from society because you needed to be rehabilitated?

That’s what each prisoner is doing while in jail, or at least that’s the idea. The time spent in prison will help them make better choices when they finally come out

We all know that hardly ever works, at least not for the majority of prisoners. Instead, once released, the inmate will most likely find a way to end up right back where they now feel they belong

Why?

Continue reading “34: Dead Time”

32: On The Eve Of Opportunity

Tomorrow opportunity awaits

In my case this is literally the case. Tomorrow I will film my very first corporate gig from my side hustle

For the next couple of months, it will become one of my main focuses, until the work is done

Hopefully work begets more work and leads to other opportunities

But here’s the thing. Everyday of our lives we are all on the eve of opportunity

Just moments away from things we presently can only dream of

Just keep walking towards them, doing all you know to do and trusting that when the time is right, the eve of opportunity will turn into the day of…

Be well

SRZ

20: Don’t be passionate

Imagine that!

What book would advocate for its readers not to be passionate?

Ryan Holidays!

In Ego is the Enemy – Ryan suggests that the reason why so many of us fail to actually accomplish anything is because we are too passionate about it. We care so much that we consume our time with talking about our passions rather than doing something about it

Passion can be seen in those who can tell you in great detail who they intend to become and what their success will be like – they might even be able to tell you specifically when they intend to achieve it or describe to you legitimate and sincere worries they have about the burdens of such accomplishments. They can tell you all the things they’re going to do, or have even begun, but they cannot show you their progress. Because there rarely is any

Those of us with great visions of grandeur may be able to articulate exactly what it is we will accomplish in this world but ask anybody of true grit and experience and they will tell you just how hard it is to make anything of yourself

It certainly doesn’t require passion to do so

Passion typically masks weakness

Are we trying to compensate for our lack of experience or competence in our chosen field of endeavours by being so ‘passionate’ about it?

What humans require in our ascent is purpose and realism

Ryan seems to think we are and I think he’s managed to get me to agree.

I only need to use my own life as a case study for this. As I read this chapter I simultaneously reflected on my life and the multiple things I’ve once been passionate about

Most of them I did not follow through with, many of them I barely got started with and yet if you had met me at the time of my intense passion for any one of those things, I’m confident I would of sold you on my dreams and aspirations at the time

Dreams and aspirations that would later fade into the memories of my yesteryears

What I needed was not passion or at least not passion alone but rather a heavy dose of realism.

Had I known the reality of what it would truly take to actualise my passions, I would not be bragging about them because I’d be so concerned with the many pitfalls that day in and day out my time would be consumed with preparation, execution, feedback, adjustment and execution again

While doing all of that – I don’t think I’d have time to be so ‘passionate’

The critical work that you want to do will require your deliberation and consideration. Not passion

Needless to say, this chapter gave me much to think about in how I presently approach my work

Be well

SRZ

13: One day at a time

You only live once

Yes. But it goes deeper than that. You also only live one day at a time

Sure, you can visualise and daydream about your future and of course you can reminisce on past events, reliving the trauma but ultimately, the day you’re living now is the only one most important

It’s so interesting how heartache and grief are the rare occasions where everyone advises us to take it one day at a time

Are you broken hearted and desperately seeking to end the suffering? Everyone will tell you, it will take time, so just take it slowly and see each day as it comes

Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Everyone will encourage you that the pain will fade in time but it’s a process and there’s no telling when that day will be so in the meantime, take it a day at a time

Pain has a powerful way of keeping our minds locked in the present day. We may want to escape, deny what we feel but yet it’s too acute, it hurts way to much to ignore

So we it’s leaves us with very limited choices. We either numb it with food, sex, retail therapy, binging entertainment, drugs and alcohol….not to mention God, religion, work and working out

The pain pushes us into flight or fight, activity or inactivity but one way or the other, for a brief period of time, we’re reminded that we can’t escape the 24 hours assigned to us

And that’s all any of us have

24 hours. The billionaire and the homeless person alike have that one thing in common, they both have 24 hours. They both can only experience life one day at a time

The rich person can’t buy more time with their money and the poor person can’t lose the time they have due to a lack of resources

We are all fairly given the same 24 hours

My point being: what would your everyday life begin to look like if all you did was focus on doing everything you wanted to do that day?

Imagine you did that 365 times. Where would or could your life end up?

Perhaps that very question is equally flawed because it instantly forces you to think ahead to a years time, the imagined place you could be and that’s not my point

My point is pay no attention to nothing else but the day you have today. Carpe Diem and all that

Imagine al you cared about was today?

After all, isn’t that all you have?’are you promised tomorrow?

Okay then focus on what’s right in front of you

Be well

SRZ

12: Become a Prosumer

We live in a capitalist society

We also live in a world where we are told that we are not enough and marketing companies exploit that fact

Every week there’s a new miracle diet, cosmetic line, fashion trend. In other words, a new special something to solve all your problems

If you feel you lack something, worry no more because here comes the news honey thing that will fix that lack in your life

Consumption

There’s nothing wrong with it. I love the latest gadget, clothes and other stuff

But if that’s all I did

If all I ever wanted was to consume, consume, consume then guess what? Eventually all that consumption would consume me

At least I’d feel it in my bank account

Here comes that word again, balance. Something needs to balance out all that consumption

Produce

You need to be a producer. A producer creates, they bring something of value to the market place

Producing something will make you wealthy. However you measure wealth, money, love, loyalty, health. These things come from production not consumption

A productive individual actively works towards making things happen

If you produce nothing, you’ll earn nothing. If all you do is consume, eventually you’ll be consumed

But if you merge the two, you can comfortably be a ‘prosumer’ – a hybrid of of a producer and a consumer

That means you not only write the checks but you produce the paper it’s written on! Think about it

Close the circle between producing and consuming and the wheel will keep turning

You consume too much food and produce no energy output to balance it out and watch your body mass expand until it causes health problems

Even having money without letting go of some results in a hoarding stingy heart. Why do you think the wealthy are philanthropic?

The yin and yang keep the balance of man

Produce, consume then produce again

Be a prosumer

Food for thought

Be well

SRZ

11: why compete when you can create?

It’s hard out there

There is apparently so much competition out in ‘the big bad world’ and that thought alone can intimidate people into inactivity

When you have others to compare yourself to, most of us have one of two reactions. We either believe we are inferior or superior to them

Both are extreme thoughts and both are essentially wrong

We are inferior to no one

We are superior to no one

We are as unique as everyone else

So, this being the case, we need not compete against anyone

We need not compare ourselves to anyone

All we need to do is create

The more we create and produce, the more of a unique space we will carve out for ourselves

The more we focus on creating and releasing our creation, the more self sufficient we will become

The more self sufficient we are, the more empowered we’ll feel and ultimately the more unstoppable we’ll end up

So why waste your time competing with others when you can be creating for yourself?

Be well

SRZ

6: Stillness For Steel-ness

Okay, so steel-ness is not a word

But I hope the wordplay worked

I’m in need of some quiet time

I should make time to meditate and be still

But I haven’t done it in a long time

I keep putting it off. There’s never enough time

Yet my inner person is craving it

So why do I avoid something I crave so much?

Because I fear it at the same time

I worry that I won’t like who I find waiting for me within if I took the time to look

I’m worried that before steel-ness comes from stillness, it will break me first

Perhaps it’s all the frustration I fail to to discuss or disclose for fear of upsetting others

Or maybe it’s the disappointments I bury deep inside to help me better cope with life

Who truly knows?

The inner me does

I know this may all be too hippie dippie for some. Too woo woo for others and even bizarre for another set of people but this is me

I’m a mixture of urban black boy meets spiritual interests, centred and grounded in creative exploits

I can pretend to be someone else, something else but it would never satisfy me in the end

So stillness it is

At some point I will overcome the fear of what lies beneath the surface and decide to take a look

How bad can it be?

Be well

SRZ