I could stop there. That is as true a statement as any. Taking too long, pondering and overthinking leads to analysis paralysis. An inability to act because you’ve thought things through too much.
And why, why do we do this? Why do we think ourselves out of action and into inaction?
Doesn’t matter if it’s a fear of failure, rejection or something else. Ultimately we’re afraid of being hurt.
Self preservation is a powerful instinct, it has helped humankind survive for centuries; but like any other good thing, if left unchecked, self preservation can easily turn into self limitations.
The same thing that was meant to protect you now keeps you caged in self imprisonment, afraid to venture out for fear of being killed.
Death is more than just physical. If it wasn’t, it would top the list of humanity’s greatest fear but it often doesn’t top the list, but do you know what does?
Imagine that. Some people are more afraid of what others may potentially think of them for speaking in public than they are of dying!
Addiction is a little like that too. You can get so used to being caught in its vicious cycle that you can’t think of an alternative way of doing things.
An different way of living life.
You begin to believe that you will always be an alcoholic, a gambler, procrastinator or like me a pornography/ lust addict.
Your mind is convinced that things will never change because they could never change.
But that’s not the truth.
The truth is this: you can change your life any time. it’s all a matter of choice.
Don’t over think it, have the thought, make a decision to act and make a change to your immediate future and go for it. Take action
For me, the decision was based off one day. Caught up in a cycle of lust and porn. I just wanted to have one day where I didn’t do it, one day where it wasn’t part of my routine.
One day where I could consider myself as ‘free’
I took action and resisted for one day.
That one day has grown to multiple days, I won’t say how many for fear (there’s that word again) of losing my sobriety.
The days don’t matter as much as the decision did.
I can honestly say I’m slowly becoming a much better person than who I was while trapped in that cycle of pornography/lust and and masturbation.
It didn’t connect with the person I believe myself to be. I know there is a better, stronger man within. I became really sick of him not showing up.
I’m grateful to be on this journey now, that strong man within feels like he’s just about yawning awake, realising that his long slumber and sleep is over and he is long due to make an appearance.
He still needs to stretch, get himself together but at least he’s awake.
Everything I’ve achieved in life so far has been through a broken boys attempts to succeed. An insecure young mans quest for identity and purpose.
What will happen when the man within takes over?
Watch this space!