Sometimes I still think about her
When I’m really curious, I ask about her: married with a child was the answer I last got. I smile, I’m happy for her.
But a part of me, thankful these days its only a very small part of me, still wishes her happiness had been with me
The road not travelled is one of life’s many opportunities to ask ourselves ‘what if’, what if I had pursued or in some cases not pursued a particular outcome
What if the love had been reciprocal? What if I didn’t walk away? What if I had been given the loan? what if I had followed my gut instincts? What if…the possible answers are endless and in the long run not healthy or helpful because the real answer is, so what?
So what if things didn’t go the way you planned, plan the way things go from here, in your new reality.
You and I have both lived long enough (i’m assuming) to know that life is rarely fair for anybody living. This is irrespective of class, race or social standing, we all get dealt a bad hand someway somehow
So, if the love had been reciprocal then it would have led to the challenge of a real relationship. The mundane bits, the difficult bits and the moments where all you can think about is wanting out, being free and single again
It’s easy to only imagine the bliss, the happiness and joy that the road not travelled could have brought us. only problem is, it’s all in our imagination, conjured by a mind seeking escape from its present reality
Of course in our minds, events go smooth and without a hitch. We have a business idea, create a business plan then turn that idea into a million, scratch that, a billion dollar enterprise -ignoring the fact that we’re not even trading in America!
We would of married our first loves and would have lived in eternal bliss with them and however many kids (none for some) we wanted forever ever, ever ever, ever ever (in Kanye West voice)
Life is short some people say
Life is actually long (in my opinion) but it’s our memories and our abilities to remember every detail of every day we’ve ever lived, that is short.
If given the choice would you rather have 33 years of a very well lived, useful and significant life or 95 years of a poorly lived life? (well lived vs poorly lived, being relative to you)
Would you choose 5 years of a relationship full of fairy tale love like the books and movies or 30 years of gruelling matrimony with little happiness involved?
Sometimes we say we want one thing, like, marriage, when what we really want is to love and be loved regardless. We say we want money when beneath the surface what we really mean is we want the freedom money makes possible
Thinking you want one thing when you really want something else entirely can lead to a lot of disappointments, I can personally testify to this
So, the road not travelled may or may not have been everything we would of hoped for or wanted had we taken it but that is besides the point
While you’re staring out the window of your metaphorical life car at the other roads you could have taken, the current one you are driving is littered with threats and opportunities, both of which you wont see coming if you keep your eyes off the road for too long
So pay close attention to the road that you’re on, pay as little attention as possible to any other road you could have been on
There may or may not come a time when you reach a fork in the road and you will again be faced with a choice. Left or right? Whatever choice you make, the other choice will sometimes haunt you with what could have been but again, ignore it and drive on, knowing that another fork will appear further ahead
And this time, be a little brave and rather than choosing right or left – choose forward and create a new path, leaving a trail behind you for others to follow
Make your own path in 2018