46: Stop Fooling Yourself

Stop fooling yourself in life:

You don’t have 9 lives, you will eventually die and disappear and never be remembered

So put some fire under your feet and get to stepping

Stop fooling yourself in work:

Nobody’s gonna do the work for you and if you allow yourself to be mediocre or average then your results will be the same

You won’t land into a great career by accident

Time and effort are not only a requirement but a basic necessity for your career and work to flourish

The 40 hour work week may not be enough

Leaving things to chance will definitely not be acceptable

Stop fooling yourself with Love

The butterflies you’re feeling is not love

The chemistry between the two of you will eventually fade

Like anything else, it will take time, effort and attention for it to work

There are no meant to be’s, no made for each other couples

Only two people who were lucky enough to share enough similar values and enough differences to balance each other really well

And even then, it’s not set in stone that you will be together forever

Stop fooling yourself, Cupid doesn’t exist and if he does, he doesn’t care about your love life

So you need to do whatever it takes to make it all you envision

Stop fooling yourself with family

They are not perfect, neither are you

The minute you turned 18 you became responsible for your own life

Act like it

Stop fooling yourself with money

Learn how it works if you will never have any of it

Discover and understand compound interest

Save as much as you can

Invest as much as you can

Spend with a conscious, yes you should be smart with your spending but always remember that life is equally short

Spend money on experiences

Stop fooling yourself with success

Only you can determine what it means to be successful to you

Don’t follow anyone else’s definition of it

Don’t pretend you have it before you do

Once you decide what it is, work as hard as you can to manifest it

Stop fooling yourself with failure

Every day you overlook your true desires and don’t attempt to at least walk towards them is a failure

Failure (like success) isn’t permanent

You decide what it means to fail

Make it very hard to fail and very easy to succeed – how?

You decide, you’ll know when you’ve figured it out for yourself

Stop fooling yourself with time

it’s finite – just like you

So don’t waste it

Make the most of it

And who knows, perhaps something about you will outlive your short timespan

That’s the only way to be remembered

Be well


45: Weak Lives

Seven days without hustle makes one weak

I was thinking yesterday about how I spend my days

How we all spend our days

I came to the realisation that the majority of us ( myself included) spend our time just trying to ‘get’ through the day

Getting Through The Day

Getting through the day is a mindset where you feel like you have very little control over your time, circumstances and life

Your boss and workplace have a claim on your time

You spouse, partner or significant other have a claim on your time

Your bills, expenses and income (or lack thereof) claim your mind

Your health, state of mental and emotional wellbeing claim your mind

And yet none of it makes you feel like you’re in control

You feel bombarded with these worries

Where do you start? What do you take on first?

So, rather than swim against the currents and fight, we opt to just get through the day until it’s over

That’s a formula for disaster in the long run because you learn nothing, gain nothing and eventually become nothing more than that which you already are

Getting From The Day

On the other hand, with a little more exercise of self determination and will power we can choose to get ‘from’ the day

That is: we can choose to learn something new from our day, every day

Imagine the amount of retained knowledge you would earn by the end of the week, let alone month or year

Getting from the day is about facing each day with the desire to become more than we were the day before

Even at a 1% improvement rate, you would move a lot faster and get a lot further than not making the effort

So, aim to get something from your day

Develop new distinctions that will help you navigate through life better than you did yesterday

Be well


44: Discomfort Zone

You will hate it

It will make you feel insecure and uncertain

You will think it’s a punishment from God, the universe or just life

But you will be grateful for it in the end

Choose to follow your discomforts and live as often as possible in the realm of your discomforts, why?

Because there is truly no other way to grow

Comfort and pleasure may feel good for a period of time but they kill potential and possibilities if we linger there too long

That’s not to say that we should never seek out ease, pleasure or comfort but it’s to say that we should never backdown from the possibility of feeling a little pain, enduring a little discomfort and maintaining a strenuous existence

You want to destroy your chances of growth as a human being? No worries, here’s what to do

Never try anything you haven’t already absolutely mastered

Never do anything you worry will make you look foolish or stupid in the eyes of others

Never make a mistake or even consider making a decision that could lead to you making a mistake

Never take up new interest or try new hobbies

Always listen to your fears and insecurities, especially when they scream at you that you will fail and be rejected

The list could go on and on but I think you get the point already

If you want to grow as a person than do the opposite of the listed points above

Be well


43: Ties that Bind Us


They’re supposed to be the ones that never fail you, are always there for you no matter what

I am fortunate to feel and experience that from my own family(most of the time)

But family are also the people who hurt you the deepest, disappointing you in the worst ways

Yet, they are bound to you one way or another for life. Regardless of whether you choose to acknowledge them or not

Ties that bind us are instrumental to our well being, they help us develop a sense of belonging

At this very moment, I feel very frustrated with certain members of my family

The reason for this current anger is so minimal but yet that’s what happens when you let things slide for too long, even a small misunderstanding becomes a seemingly insurmountable mountain

Old wounds begin to feel fresh again and you start to internally ask yourself “aren’t you passed this? I thought you were over this already?”

Guess not

Family is a very important construct of society, and there are no families that lack for drama or dysfunctional tendencies of their own unique brand

Before they mess you up too much though, always remember that even with families, there’s a need for clear boundaries and respectful communication

We may all be flawed individuals but that should never be an excuse and yes we may be family but that doesn’t give anyone license to behave undignified

The ties that bind us are supposed to serve as a foundation that keeps us grounded but serve as a springboard to greater heights

They should never feel like they are sinking us further down or even keeping us in the same place all our lives

Be well


42: When You’re Close To A Breakthrough….

I’m a few days/weeks away from a breakthrough

This is business/career related and it’s got me excited and making plans for my future

The potential for what may become possible for me due to this life opportunity is truly incredible but yet…..it’s almost like I’m concerned that it may not happen and what would happen to me if this were to be the case

I’ve wanted to talk about this with close friends for a while but have decided not to because it has yet to happen and I don’t want to speak to soon. I’ve now decided that even if it does happen, I will not be talking about it with anyone other than those it impacts directly

Why am I writing about it then, if I don’t intend on discussing what the opportunity is even if it does materialise? I’m not writing about the ‘opportunity’ – rather, I’m writing about what happens to me internally when I’m close to having things I’ve worked for actually work out in my favour

It’s like I start fearing the worst and expecting a bad outcome, thankfully, I’ve had enough good things happen to me in life for me to know that more often than not, in the end, things will work out for me (same goes for you) and on occasions when they haven’t worked out for me, I have always been grateful for that later on

The point being, I believe that whatever is meant for you will always come to you no matter how long it takes or the obstacles you face along the way

As a screenwriter, I know that a typical story has the protagonist (lead character) working towards an objective, a dream, a goal. At some point during the story, our hero will lose everything they hold near and dear and it will seem like they won’t achieve their goal

Something will happen to inspire the character to try one more time and this time things will suddenly workout and in the end, the character would evolve, becoming different to who and what they were when we first saw them

Real life can be similar to that – it’s often darkest before the dawn,a set back becomes a set up for a come back….and more cliches of this nature but it doesn’t make them any less true

So as I sit and wait for my potential breakthrough, I remind myself that whether it happens or not, my grind won’t stop, I will work just as hard to find another way to make things happen if it doesn’t through this opportunity

I’m grateful to be in a position where multiple projects are attached to me and I continue to create more projects with each passing day. The only thing missing at this point; is the financial rewards but I’m not sweating that, I am convinced that money is not to be chased but attracted through the amount of work you put in

So I’ll keep putting in that work

This opportunity will happen (anything’s possible to those that believe) and more opportunities of this kind and better will continue to come my way once this one has manifested

The only thing I have left to do is be grateful

I am blessed, you are blessed, we are blessed if we but only take the time to acknowledge that we are

Be well


41:The Art of War Philosophy

‘The enemy of my enemy is my friend’

Just one of the quotable lines and philosophies found in the book ‘Art of War’

It’s been a while since I read it, and by a while I mean at least 5 years or more

But I do remember many things from it

The main point of the book being, no action you take should be done without thought to the consequence or the outcome. Every move you make should be executed with the precision of a chess master running a check mate move

Some consider it a very manipulative piece of literature

Others consider it a bible for success

Guess it just depends on perspective

What I do know is that philosophy in life is needed – having clear ideas for how you want your life to be, the way you want your life to run and the principles you aim to live by and stay true to – all of it is important

A famous radio personality once said that he lives by the principle given to him by his father which goes along the lines of “you’re never as good or as bad as they say you are” meaning, stay neutral

Don’t believe the ‘hype’ about yourself and with the same attitude don’t fall for the exaggerated criticism you hear being said about you either

Ever felt like “life’s a bitch and then you die”?

How about “all rich people are crooks and all nice guys finish last and whoever smelt it dealt it” – those are all some forms of philosophical ideas that, believe it or not, if you have those thoughts in your head then to some degree, you live by those thoughts

There is an art to war

It doesn’t matter what form the war comes in or what type of war it is – a war is a war and nobody in history ever selected to lose

So how do you handle your wars? Do you whine, moan, complain? Do you do as the Christians advocate and turn the other cheek or do you get even?

Each response is as unique as the person reading but also each response will highlight to you what your philosophy on life really is

How you handle conflict is probably more telling of who you are as a person than anything else in your day to day ordinary life

The only thing more revealing of your character than how you handle conflict, is how you handle success

But , we’ll leave that for another day

Be well



40: Be Present

Today was a good day

I took time off work to rest and recover

I caught up with an actor turned friend and had such an amazing time with her just discussing life

Then I met up with someone I’m currently working with on a new project, a documentary around cycling and Africa

It’s still every new and at the early stages of development so that’s all I’m going to say about it for now but needless to say, I’m really excited about it!

Being present, to me, is all about giving your undivided attention to whatever you’re doing right this minute

In my case it would be writing

We have reason to be distracted, there are so many things vying for our attention

But we do ourselves a disservice when we allow that to happen, when we allow our minds to be scattered across multiple thoughts, concerns and worries

It reduces the impact we can have on the people right in front of us

It reduces the enjoyment we can have right here right now, since we are spending more time reliving past events or anticipating future ones

Take a deep breath

Let that breath re-centre you back to the present moment

Life is now

It can only ever be lived one day at a time, right here in the present

So be here

Be well